For a few days we went from talking every day to sporadic texting. So I was quite surprised when he cheerfully asked me out on a lovely date.Throughout the date I kept expecting him to bring up the conversation about space, but it never happened.At the time, I hadn’t experienced the kind of intimacy that makes you want to caretake and bend boundaries.There was still the possibility that the next romance would be the one where I’d fall so hard I’d want to give up some . Introverts can be in committed relationships if we are mindful of our energy and create meaningful connections. If we act maturely and build trust by working through hurt/disappointment/frustration with our partners rather than running at the first sign of discomfort (like when we feel confined). If we are not interested in a relationship, we have to own that and be up front with potential partners.Sure, everyone is different and you might just find that person that needs exactly the same amount of space as you.
Apparently to him asking for space was akin to asking to borrow a sweatshirt. This episode made me realize that men and women have radically different needs when it comes to managing together time in a romantic relationship.It’s why I don’t label or judge people and is a big part of my coaching methods.I used to think differently when I was younger: I had a big ego, I was always trying to be better than everybody else, life was about success or failure.I never thought I could be contributing toxicity to the relationship. They were always going for the other guys who I thought just weren’t that great.I would judge the women as shallow, I would judge the guy as a douche or worthless or whatever else I could think of to keep my ego intact.